Family fortunes wrong and funny answers

• An animal you cannot fit into a Mini car: "Mouse.."
• A food that has one or more holes in it: "Spaghetti.."
• Something made of wool: "Cotton wool.."
• An animal with three letters: "Lion.."
• A bad place to fall asleep: "Concrete.."
• A French ferry port: "Dover.."
• Something you mount: "A mountain.."
• Something you lose when you get older: "Your purse.."
•  A sport which involves throwing something: "Tennis.."
• A type of bean: "Lesbian.."
• Something you would play with in the bath: "A bazooka.."
•  Someone you wouldn't swear in front of: "Yourself.."
• A country where Arabic is spoken: "Nigeria.."
•  Someone or something whose existence has never been proven: "Hitler.."
•  A number you might have to memorise: "Seven.."
• Something that makes you close your eyes: "Dark.."
• Something that comes in pairs: "Rabbits.."
•  A way of toasting someone: "Over a fire.."
•  A Boy's name beginning with the letter J: "Gerald.."
• An instrument you can play while walking in the street: "A cello.."
• A type of oil: "Sewing-machine oil.."
• A word beginning with Z: "Xylophone.."
• A slang word for a girl: "Slag.."
• An animal with horns: "A bee..."
•  A medieval weapon: "Hand-grenade.."
• Something made of wool: "A sheep.."
•  Something a bridegroom might wear: "A dress.."
• Someone you wouldn't expect to see in a strip club: "Animals.."
• An animal with a long tail: "A rabbit.."
• Something a train-spotter would have in his pocket: "A magnifying glass.."
• Something you put out for the birds: "Worms.."
• A way to prevent snoring: "Put a pillow over his face.."
• A word used to describe a very hot day: "A very hot day.."
• A song from 'The Sound Of Music': "Dancing Queen.."
•  Someone who works early hours: "A burglar.."
• Something made to be wheeled around: "A hammer.."
• A reason for kneeling: "To be beheaded.."
• A nickname for a slim person: "Slimmy.."
• A measurement of liquid: "Paint.."
• Something that's nice to wear next to your skin: "Pants.."
• A famous Dick: "Carrot.."
• A wild animal that's native to Britain: "A bear.."
• Something that Father Christmas does when he comes to your house: "Feeds your pets.."
• Something that comes in 7's: "Fingers.."
• A vocalist known by only one name: "Michael Jackson.."
• A yellow fruit: "Orange.."
• An animal beginning with B: "Bullfrog.."
• Something associated with Liverpool: "The Yellow Brick Road.."
• A boy mentioned in a nursery rhyme: "Little Red Riding Hood.."
• Something associated with Queen Victoria: "Her husbands.."
• Something you hide in your socks when you go swimming: "Your legs.."
• A place you would keep a pen: "A zoo.."
• Something you beat: "An apple.."
• Something associated with rain: "Water.."
• An animal that lives in the English countryside: "A lion.."
• Something you make into a ball: "Eggs.."
• A game that uses a black ball: "Darts.."
• A popular TV soap: "Dove.."
• Other than 'carrier', a type of bag: "Horse.."
• Something you might find in a garage: "a grand piano.."
• Something a Frenchman would say: "On Garde.."
• A fast animal: "A hippo.."
• Something you keep in the garden: "A cat.."
• Something that gives you goosebumps: "Mumps.."
• A character from Little Red Riding Hood: "Hansel and Gretel.."
• Something that has a shell: "Batman.."
• Any dance apart from the waltz: "The ball dance.."
• Something a policeman might say: "Spread 'em.."
• Something that frightens Dracula: "The King of the Vampires.."
• A non-living object with legs: "A plant.."
• A sign of the Zodiac: "April.."
• An animal associated with a nursery rhyme: "Andy Pandy.."
• A mode of transport that you can walk in: "Your shoes.."
• An animal with big ears: "A bear.."
• Something you do on water: "Wallpaper.."
• A musical instrument you can play in the bath: "A drum kit.."
• Something associated with Egypt: "Cigars..
• A part of your body you only have one of: "Your big toe.."
• Something you pull: "A potato.."
• An animal used as a form of transport: "A turtle.."
• A famous Phil or Philip: "Phil Johnson.."
• A habit people try to give up: "Spitting.."
• A Thunderbirds character: "Doctor Spock.."
• Another TV gameshow with the word 'family' in the title: "The Generation Game.."
• A seaside resort on the south coast: " Rio de Janeiro.."
• Something you open other than a door: "Your bowels.."
• Something with a red light on it: "a Dalek.."
• Something that makes you scream: "A squirrel.."
• A food than can easily be eaten without chewing: "Chips.."
• A type of record: "A floppy disk.."
• A type of large cat: "Persian.."
• A job that a working dog does: "A slave.."
• Something people might be allergic to: "Skiing.."
• An occupation where you need a torch: "A burglar.."
• A well known superstition: "Running in front of a car.."
• Something you use a microchip in: "A fish-fryer.."
• A dangerous race: "The Arabs.."
• A game played in the dark: "Charades.."
• Some famous brothers: "Bonnie and Clyde.."
• A jacket potato topping: "Jam.."
• A part of the body you have more than two of: "Arms.."
• Something you find on a fire engine: "Coal.."
• A famous royal: "Mail.."
• Something you do before going to bed: "Sleep.."
• An item of clothing worn by the Three Muskateers: "A horse.."
• An animal you see at the zoo: "Dog.."
• Something you might do in a power cut: "Read a book.."
• A famous Parisian landmark: "Hawaii.."
• One of Harry Enfield's characters: "Sooty.."
• A famous Irishman: "Disraeli.."
• The first place detectives look for fingerprints: "The floor.."
• Something you associate with the sea: "A coffin.."
• A famous Arthur: "Shakespeare.."
• A type of cut: "Skull.."
• A weapon in the game of Cluedo: "Dice.."
• Something people take to the beach: "Turkey.."
• A reason someone digs a hole in the road: "Grave digger.."
• An ingredient in chicken stuffing: "Chicken.."
• Something a girl should know about a man before marrying him: "His name.."
• A bird with a long neck: "A blackbird.."
• A bird with a long neck (2): "Naomi Campbell.."
• An item of clothing a woman might borrow from a man: "Underpants.."
• Something taken from a hotel as a souvenir: "The lamps.."
• Something you keep in a garden shed: "A gardener.."
• A song with moon in the title: "Blue Suede Moon.."
• A famous cowboy: "Buck Rogers.."
• A famous Wild-West character: "Wild Bill Eacock.."
• Something you'd associate with the three bears: "Red Riding Hood.."
• Fruit used in fruit salad: "Cucumber.."
• Something you wear on the beach: "A deckchair.."
• A method of cooking fish: "Cod.."
• Something you borrow from your partner: "Shoes.."
• A part of the body beginning with N: "Knee.."
• A famous Scotsman: "Vinnie Jones.."
• A famous Scotsman (2): "Jock.."
• Something red: "My cardigan.."
• A kind of ache: "Fillet-o-fish.."
• Something you open other than a door: "Your bowels.."
• Something with a hole in it: "A window.."
• Something you do in the bathroom: "Decorate.."
• Something you put on walls: "Roofs.."
• A domestic animal: "A leopard.."
• Something that floats in the bath: "Water.."
• Something in the garden that's green: "The shed.."
• Something a blind man might use: "A sword.."
• The last thing you take off before going to bed: "Your feet.."
• Something that flies without an engine: "A bicycle with wings.."